User blog:Cattlepult/satire news article numero uno

oh joy oh boy k posted a new blog post and now it's time for me to make a bunch of jokes about it.

time to go into full grammar mode in 3... 2... 1...

K finally answered our wonderful and delightful questions we gave her about... uh... 2 weeks ago? Anyways, I should probably recap it for you guys. And this is a joke. A big old joke. -- --
 * 1) The first question she answered was about the polar bear in Mount Snow that vanished without a trace. K responded with the fact that polar bears are a "nomadic" species. In other words, the polar bear died from global warming.
 * 2) This one was for the people who went out of their way and finished all of the quests. What do they do now? The answer was that you should probably something else until the developers finally finish up the new areas. Maybe read a book. Go outside. Do what you want to do. Except for flying. You can't do that yet.
 * 3) alivor02 asked: "K, What's your favorite quest?" She said it was the octopus quest. Apparently it was "tough." Meh. She couldn't stand the wrath of the octopus and had to call for backup so she could capture those beautful friends of ours.  She had to destroy our wonderful little empire we had set up billions of years before those filthy humans appeared. 
 * 4) Speaking of octopuses, inanis (aka me) asked if octopuses were smart. I already knew the answer however: They were. And she answered the question correctly. You dodged a bullet there, K. You really did. If you had said the wrong answer, you would've regretted it.
 * 5) Oh. KK is turning 30 in the next couple of months. There is going to be a kart that doesn't have 4 wheels. It won't have 4 wheels, it will have 224,000 of them.
 * 6) There's going to be new areas. Gus made friends with a cactus. This means there's going to be a cave. Obviously.

Ending full grammar mode in 3... 2... 1...

geez, that was a wild ride. i just put this together for the fun of it. i might make more, i might not. who knows. only i do.